What makes a confident rider?

5 things that confident riders do differently

What is TRUE confidence?  Not the fake "Riding loudly with confidence" types that are actually just trying to cover up their own insecurities by projecting their opinions on to you. Not the riders with all the bravado that give a performance and  "make" the horse do things 'because they are not scared of any horse.' trying to impress onlookers.

I mean REAL confidence that inspires others. They are grounded in who they are, they are quietly doing what feels aligned to their values, listening to their intuition, regardless of what others are saying or doing. For me this is real confidence.

I see a lot of fake confidence in the horse world. Everyone has an opinion, and they all have the reasons why they are right. Sadly these personalities diminish the confidence of the quieter unconfident rider.

I love noticing the quietly confident people that just DO what feels right. They have nothing to prove to others.

5 Things Confident Riders do differently

1.  Happiness comes from within

I know it sounds like a cliché, but for you to be happy in what you do, you first need to be happy in who you are. Confident riders are clear about what they stand for, what values they hold around their horses. They don't need validation from others and whilst happy to listen and learn from others, they don't need to change what they are doing based on others opinions.  They will celebrate others wins because they have no need to keep others down to succeed themselves.

2. Leaders in their own story 

Confident people know that they will figure out any issue that arises. They are not spending time worrying about made up future scenarios, because they know that whatever happens they will work through it and be ok, therefore they progress and lead themselves forward.  They don't spend time being 'victims' to the circumstances around them feeling like life is happening "to" them and they are powerless to change it.

3.  Non- Judgemental Of Others

They know that everyone is on their own journey, and therefore don't feel the need to compare themselves to others. Everyone is both student and teacher. They are not worried about being wrong, and therefore don't need to judge others for doing things differently to themselves

4.  Able to say No to others

Confident riders are able to say no. Especially when this concerns the welfare of their horse.  No matter how loudly someone tells them that their horse should have shoes on/off, or be ridden in this or that bit, they will listen to their intuition. They will do what they feel is right with the information they have.

5. They don't wait to feel confident

Confident riders will still 'do' in the moments when they don't have certainty. Whilst unconfident riders will search the internet looking for the "right" answer, speak to 43 experts and then freeze because they all suggest something slightly different.  Confident riders will choose a path knowing they will make the outcome work, even if it doesn't go as expected.  They are not worried about failing or making the wrong choice because they know they will learn and move on from it

How to grow your confidence levels

You can't just buy it off a shelf (imagine how cool that would be though!)  It's not a quick magic pill you can just take and feel fabulous about who you are.  However, the fantastic thing is ANYONE can grow their confidence. Here’s some tips for starters

Know that you are enough. Just by existing you deserve to be here. It is not dependant on your riding abilities, what your dressage score was or that woman down the stables opinion of you.  You are worthy of being here just by being you.

Do what you say you are going to do.  This builds self-trust and confidence. Follow through on your commitments to yourself and your horse.

Choose your circle.  Hang out with those that build you up and celebrate you for who you are.

Learn how to be comfortable with discomfort

Check in on your self-talk. Would you speak to a friend how you speak to yourself?

Try new things and reflect on the learning experience

Take action, even when you’re not certain it’s the perfect decision.

When things don't go to plan, use it to learn and grow and not as a reason to beat yourself up. 

A confident rider will come from a confident person. Once you feel that sense of self, who you really are (not who you've become to fit in) you'll be doing exactly what YOU want to be doing with your horse and loving every bloody minute of it!